Saturday, January 22, 2011

Chasing the Jersey - Too Often, Too Fast?

Now that I've gotten over my week of being a fucking pathetic girl, I'm bak on the mend. Let's talk Kim Kardashian for a hot sex, shall we?

Now, I might be the only person in the world who actually doesn't hate Kim Kardashian, her sisters or her family. Possibly because my family is so domestically challenged that I can appreciate the surprising normality of some of the shit that isn't scripted into their show, but regardless, I don't hate them. I also value that Kim is like, the world's biggest jersey chaser and had a relationship with RB and shit like that. And, they all call their mom Kris. I call my mom by her first name as well sometimes. I dunno, issues. But I don't think she's a Paris Hilton, I don't. Sue me, but it's true.

So a few months ago, Kim told Gabriel whatever his name is (the model who knocked up Halle Berre) to fuck off and she got with Kris Humphries from the New Jersey Nets. There were back and forth rumors about it going south and her moving on to Kanye West (I can't even), but now Page Six is reporting Humphries and K-Dash are on their way to picking out an engagement ring, and Humphries has been shopping the Diamond District.

Also, The Jersey Chaser hooked me up with the fact that Kim was on The Wendy Williams Show (good God) and told Wendy that Kris was a really good guy. She said she took her time with the relationship and she's tried to keep it low key. And part of me agrees with her. Like, a lot of people didn't know they were dating, and some thought she was boning other dudes. I don't know if that's a good thing or a bad thing for a relationship? I think if you're a Kardashian, it's a good thing.

Humphries is also only 25. Kim has a cradle robbing aspect to her Jersey Chasing, which I think works against her. I'm 25 and the dudes I date who are around my age want to bang and go to work and maybe sometimes grab Bud Lights. I don't think they're getting engaged, he is probably buying her a nice ring that doesn't go on the left hand, but I doubt it's an engagement ring. And if it is, I hope Humphries is prepared for the spin off show that I'm sure will be derived from their wedding plans.

Sidenote, no, I don't think Humphries is that attractive. Really nice arms (what do you expect) but a weird face that reminds me of an angry Rhino (I have a really fucked up imagination, don't ask). I did think Bush was a hottie, but a friend of mine told me about some seriously terrible bad breath issues he has going on, so that changed my opinion of him. But, I would rather date someone like Humphries than someone like Gabriel blah blah blah (really need to google this guy's last name). I prefer the sporty guy to the model or the dbag rapper, and I think Kim does too. Again, probably another reason I don't dislike her.


  1. Gabriel's last name is Aubry. I really like the Kardashians-I think they're funny and I love the fact that Kris is always boozed up-I would be too if they were my kids and I was their manager. I also love how Bruce Jenner is the sole voice of reason in the family (even if he's had some serious plastic surgery).

    Kim's been married before (I think when she was 19 to a music producer while she was attending USC). I can't believe I know that. I hope she finds a good guy who treats her well.

  2. G and KK use people. They are talentless, and shameless. I'd rather have a dinner date with a palm tree.

    USC is short for University of Spoiled Children....and she sure as hell didn't graduate, did she now?