Friday, January 7, 2011

Hypotheticals

A lot of people ask me if I were to seriously date an athlete, what sport would I be most interested in dating and why.

God. I mean, this question gets broken down into sub categories.

In terms of looks, if I were basing my relationship on sexual attraction, hotness of the dude, the body, and all physical aspects of the guy alone - soccer. Do you fuckers really need to even ask that? I would date a soccer player (name a couple, I'd probably agree to it) in a heart beat. Would I date soccer hottie? I don't particularly see that becoming a discussion anytime soon, thankfully, but to be honest, I enjoy my situation with him too much right now to fuck it up with feelings and tears and fights over the fact that if he's cheating now, he'll probably cheat with me too (as much as I like to think my bagina is amazing and all). So Soccer Hottie has his place in my life, and I'd like to not fuck it up. Again, I don't see that being a topic of conversation anytime soon, so it's a moot point. I get along with him really well, the sex is awesome, he's pretty fucking funny....I like our setup.

In terms of what sport I think would produce the most loyal boyfriend/husband? Ooof... I mean, fuck dude. They all cheat, seriously. But on that token I'd probably go hockey? From what I've seen, those guys seem to be the most loyal. My old NHL fuck buddy has a serious girlfriend now, and I would put money on the fact that he doesn't have a wandering eye (except when he gets drunk and his eyes go in two separate directions, no big deal). The hockey schedule also isn't too brutal, and I could settle down with a Canadian. From what I've seen and been a part of, I feel like there's more stability here, I don't know why.

In terms of what sport I think would be the coolest to be involved with on a serious level? Part of me says baseball, but if it wasn't the Yankees, it just wouldn't be that fucking cool to me. Even though I'm not into them, I think dating a football player (if you could get passed the size, infidelity, etc) would be pretty fucking cool. Football's following is awesome, I think it'd be way fun to cheer for a boyfriend or husband on the field. Cough Nick Schommer cough. I'd pull it off wayyyyyy better than Jessica Simpson ever did.

What else is there? I mean, I've dated athletes and the distance and the trust issues and the injuries and the stress of the game kind of blows sometimes. So when people ask why I'm not chasing down dudes to date seriously, it's more fun to be laid back with that shit. But yeah, I could name like, 10 soccer players I'd like to date just so I could be like "this guy is dating me and I get to see his penis on the regular". Sad, but true.

1 comment:

  1. Hey Stef,
    So I have a lot of great stories I should send you. I have dated numerous Pro Athletes, not minor league, but Pro and am friends with a ton as well. As far as who is the most Faithful, here is my personal experience. First off Football players are very segregated, the white guys hang out and the black guys hang out separately, this is because they usually have to practice with their position all day and its usually all white men as tackles and all black men as receivers and running backs. Now that said, White football players are the most faithful as athlete boyfriends, husbands. This is because when they travel they are only there a day and aren't allowed to go out at all! The Worst athlete boyfriend and husbands BY FAR are HOCKEY Players! This is because when they travel they are usually in a city for a couple days, therefore they get to go out and establish hookups from every city they go too. They will also hook up with anything b/c are foreign players and aren't picky. Baseball players are pretty bad boyfriends and husbands as well because they are gone the longest of any athlete and can stay in a city for up to 5 days. They are also the cockyest athlete out there,because they are usually the highest paid, trust me I dated an Angel & a White Sox. So anyways I could give you a lot of tips on how to get these players to commit, but if you want to settle down, def go for a fball player they are the most faithful=)

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