Tuesday, March 1, 2011

Role Reversal

I get a lot of questions of whether or not I believe sports WAGS cheat on their athletes. Normally I talk about how big of assholes the athletes themselves are, and how fidelity isn't exactly on par with the athlete lifestyle. But believe it or not, it's not all martyrdom for these women.

Think of it this way. Many - not all, obviously - but many of these marriages and relationships are more like business transactions. Hot girl marries ugly dude who plays football, for instance. Dude makes a sizable living each year. Girl is a model. Or aspiring model. Or she worked at a diner and looks like she could have BEEN a model. Seriously, these are the fucking situations.

Unfortunately, in the real world, good looking guys rarely marry ugly women (unless it's a social circle thing, whole other story that, for me, has only ever been related to lacrosse players). But good looking women do marry ugly guys. Now sure, some have great personalities that make up for the looks situation. But I think every woman I know will admit this - if there isn't one ounce, not ONE iota of attraction there, it is very very hard to fake it. Unless, that is, you're getting the attention and attraction from somewhere else.

You have these women that become professional arm pieces. Women who show up to award dinners and benefits. They look clean, professional, beautiful. They are the mother of children and they're wearing a ring, symbolizing righteousness and fidelity of the athlete as well (in the world of DOES NOT EXIST). The athlete cheats because he has the money and fame. The woman cheats because she has the looks and need. Man provides for the woman and their kids. Nice lifestyle, good house, nice cars, best schools, clothes, accessories. Woman provides family for the man - children. Provides stability every now and then. Provides a front to the public about himself as a family man. An image that will help garner, say, endorsements.

And then there are men on the side. Because there is a big difference between being in love, and loving someone. I loved one of my athlete ex boyfriends. I could see him being a great dad and supporter, I loved his family. I loved that he played baseball. But I was not in love with him. And despite how much I loved the baseball thing, I cheated on him once. Never slept with anyone else, but definitely hooked up with a guy while I was in college. Because the attraction wasn't there. I just wasn't in love. My ex laxer? Loved the kid to death and would have never dreamed of cheating. I had to end shit with baseballer eventually because I am not a business partner, I don't want to be. I can not fuck for money. I can not marry for money. And I can't love for money.

Some women can. Some women can put the face on and act as though the man she married has a personality to die for, or that she genuinely is attracted. And they live in this situation where neither really wants to be with the other, but at the end of the day, it's a lifestyle and business decision and nothing more. The guys and girls on the side? For the athletes, it's the thrill of the chase not being lost after a wedding. It's the ego of "I can have any bitch I want". It's the opportunities and the self esteem booster. For the women, most of the time, it's the "a guy that I can actually look at while we have sex", or a "a guy that actually makes me laugh" or "a guy I actually have something in common with other than children". Women tend to hide it better, also. So there is a huge level of ignorance among athletes that I think comes from the "I'm fucking awesome" mentality they have.

I see a lot of it where I work. Decent looking women (I won't necessarily say hot because honestly women who dress work appropriate for a financial job autmatically take it down a notch in hotness when I see them) who are married to fat creepy men who are balding, or super nerdy, or are 27 and have the gut my dad had at 67. But they work for Morgan, or Barclays or Goldman and they have a shit ton of money and the lifestyle that comes with it. Athlete WAGS can be just the same. Not EVERY athlete is Derek Jeter or Tom Brady or Henrik Lunquivst or David Beckham. I'm not even that fucking picky and there are backline guys and defensive ends and third string guys with no teeth or no hair or whose sole ability on the field is the fact that they weigh 389 lbs and can block. Is that what I want on top of me? Fuck no.

Business transactions. That's what that shit is to a lot of women. The ability to have the life, fame, and success of one guy and the hot body, intellectual conversation and good looks of another "struggling actor". So no, athletes aren't the only cheaters in this world. The guys turn a blind eye too a lot of the time.

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